because I need distraction at 2am vol. 1 | 5 people you meet in heaven

My brain screams the loudest in the stillness of the night. You say, “sleep it off”. I can’t because:

1. It’s too loud
2. Sleep scares me just as much

Then, I found this journaling prompts from Thought Catalog. It says there to pick a random number from the questions then spend five minutes of your morning writing your answers, but I need it most at this hour.

I’ll pick 5 questions whenever my brain messes me up and will post it here. I’ll start from the bottom of the list all the way up to the top. Maybe through this, you can learn more about me as well.

Enjoy, I guess?

50. What is something you have never done, but always wanted to do, and what is so important about this for you?

I’ve always wanted to skydive. I’m not sure if I’m scared of heights or it’s the thought of falling. Maybe the latter because I love places with high altitude.

I’ve always dreamed of reaching the sky that high, touching the clouds (I know they are mostly just like mist but yea..). Why not plane? Well, I want to feel the wind up there.

49. What makes you the most angry, the most frustrated, the most annoyed, and why?

When someone can’t stand up for himself. I think that’s the only way I know how to choose myself so I want everyone to do it, too. We have different ways, though. I have come to accept that sometimes, choosing yourself is walking away from the conflicts and avoiding the aftermath that may cause pain on all parties involved.

48. What are the five most important things in your life right now and how are you prioritizing them (or not)?

• This blog/my writings – well, I’m writing this now instead of the news article I need to submit in 8 hours
• Family – I don’t know. Broken things can still get broken, I guess? Until there’s no more left of it.
• My big 3 – I talk to them everyday. I let them know how much I love them
• Nochu (my cute little kitten!!!!) – I let it sleeps in the house even though my mother is totally against it. I buy food for him even though I’m broke lol
• Bangtan – I fangirl 🙂

47. If you could invite five people, living or dead, to dinner at your house one night, who would you choose, and what would you cook them?

• Jonghyun
• Kurt Cobain
• Robin Williams
• Vincent Van Gogh
• Virginia Woolf

I’ll make cupcakes for them because it’s the only edible thing I can do. I can fry them some eggs, too. Aaaaaah, I’ll roast them some chicken then wine. That sounds cozy.

46. What is your personal mantra for this year? What one word best describes your best life moving forward?

I don’t really feel my mantra tonight but that would probably be, “with hope, keep going“. It’s not one word but the words would be “Amor Fati”. I am slowly learning what to keep and what to let go of. I still have a long way to go, though.

I am in the mood to dissolve in the sky —Virginia Woolf

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Let me know your thoughts about these questions and maybe you can throw in your answers as well in the comments below. I’d appreciate a pool of perspective instead of a pool of tears tonight.

Thank you for reading! 🤎 Please help me keep this blog running

[Featured Image: Screenshot from Jonghyun’s Lonely MV]