because I need distraction at 2am vol. 4 | disconnect

35. What does heroic mean to you, and who are your biggest heroes?

I’m not really sure what the word means to me now. Though, it is very timely that I am watching Boku No Here Academia. Deku, the protagonist, is so reckless and brave at the same time that he literally throws himself into danger just to save anyone. It is heroic somehow. But dumb, too. Maybe, this is me being selfish. LOL I want to be honest. I’d like to consider choosing to live as heroic. I mean, we do not know what it is there for us but we live, anyway. I think there is so much courage in choosing life as well as choosing the other. It is bravery to choose something we are not sure of. What is certainty anyway?

34. What does your ideal day look like? Be specific.

Ideal day would be me going to work—as in me writing to my heart’s content. Writing about things that I want to pen down. As a freelance writer, I write things that I sometimes have zero interest in. Maybe, one day I can just work on my book or this blog full time while I earn money, too. Also, going home to a hot bath and a comfortable bed with candles on. A good night sleep—not those nights where insomnia kicks in and brain filled with paranoia.

33. What three things could you give up that would give you more time, energy, and peace?

Right now, I’d like to say the Internet, but that would be too hypocritical because I am writing this now and I need the Internet to schedule this post for tonight. LOL It is peaceful to disconnect, though. 진짜.

32. What truth have you been refusing to admit to yourself and how could you face it?

My version of being too hard on myself is actually being too honest with myself. I have long acknowledged the fact that I am this and I am not that. The hard truth? The slap of reality? Name it. I already stopped looking for answers in every damn thing. I don’t see the point anymore because really, who knows? I’m getting my shits together (at least I think I am), that is how I am facing it.

31. What makes you feel happy to be alive, and how can you make more of that every day?

This is a wrong time to answer this because I am not happy to be alive at the moment. HAHAHA It is the sole reason I am writing this now (obvious by the title). Now, scratch it. I am thinking hard out of this negativity. Right. I am happy to be able to laugh and cry with my mother. I am happy to banter with my brother. I am happy to receive random links from my father – from politics to horror movies, yall. I don’t know why he sends them anyway but it makes me laugh every time and I just miss him so bad. I am happy to be in the same timeline as Bangtan and having Junice and Mel to share these moments with. I am happy talking to Nica about astrology, art, music, passion, and anything under the sun. I am happy watching Korean dramas and learning the Korean language. I am happy watching Youtube videos and listening to different playlists and discovering new artists. I am happy to rewatch animes from my childhood and I am happy to read books. I am happy writing. I have a long list, really. It’s just that the brain fucks up most times. Well, I can make more of it every day if I will choose to live everyday and that’s what I’m going to do.

You can share your answers to these questions on the comment below, let’s talk 🙂 You can find this series I’m doing from Thought Catalog.