Are You Too Hard on Yourself?

I wonder why it’s easier to be gentle with other people than with ourselves. Have you thought about it? Are you hard on yourself? What does it even mean?

These thoughts came about when I was talking with a friend, and she was like ‘you know me. I’m too hard on myself.’

I asked what’s the point (heh) of it and if she belittles herself.

She said not really. Apparently, it is more on ‘I know I can do better or improve it.’ To be specific, we are talking about crafts and writings.

Is it being too hard on yourself when you constantly want to get better? I think not. I think being too hard on yourself is not acknowledging the fact that you can be better. I mean, why do you keep doing what you love to do when you know you suck at it? I think we don’t genuinely think we suck at it. On the contrary, we believe we are good at it (or at least not that bad), and we think we have the potential to be best at it. At least, we are trying, right?

I think being too hard on yourself is not believing in yourself. At all. It is when you don’t take people’s praises (or even criticism) as progress. It is when you don’t tell yourself you are doing a good job. If you know to yourself you are doing your best once in a while, then you are not too hard on yourself. I believe that we know when we are lying to ourselves. We know when we are doing our best and when we are not.

In my case, I said before that my crafts are mediocre. It is not belittling myself. I know I’m lacking, but I use it as a drive to make sure that I study and learn the things I need to develop my outputs. It is about my works, by the way. I know I write great poems. Does it sound conceited? Maybe, but that’s just also me not denying myself of the heart and soul that I pour in poetry. Do I think I suck at blogging? Yes, definitely but not certainly the post itself. Sometimes, it is the fact that I am inconsistent when it comes to it. Does it make sense? I love writing down my thoughts. I think my blog posts are too real and raw. I like it this way. I just hope I can articulate them better at times.

If being hard on ourselves mean we just want to be the best version that we possibly can, then be it.

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[Featured image from Medium]