so I turned 28…

The streets were unusually empty for a Sunday evening. Or has it always been like this since the pandemic? I miss the buzz of our small town, but I also love the peace and quiet now. I crossed the road—no vehicles going back and forth, no people loitering in sight. I was alone, but I don’t necessarily feel lonely.

It’s because I have the sky with me.

I looked up as I walked my way home, like I always do when I get the chance to go out. A wise friend once said that when you look up at the sky for 20 minutes a day, you will be happier. I think that’s true, to some extent.

I looked up at the sky, and it dawned on me that I am 28 now.

What does it mean to be an adult?

Some days, I feel like I carry too many responsibilities that make me an adult. Sometimes, I feel like I am not matured or responsible enough to handle things to be called an adult.

I wondered yet again: What does it mean to grow up?

I still don’t know the answer, but as I kept looking at the sky, I realized one thing…

The moon has stopped following me.

Remember when we were kids, either when we were walking or inside a car, we thought that the moon was following us wherever we go?

The moon has stopped following me now that I’ve grown up. Or have I?

Still, I will always look for it in the night sky. I will always chase it to seek comfort; to relive that familiarity of childhood that has been long gone.

Because the ever so beautiful lune will always be the only one who knows all my cracks and crevices, both hard and soft edges.

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Hello! So, I turned 28. Usually, I always have something to write on my birthday, too many reflections I want to share. Except last year. I missed writing for my 27^th on this blog. A lot has happened too fast that I couldn’t really process them.

There are still many things to write about. I just don’t want to write about them, especially not in details.

Maybe I didn’t really lose my words. Maybe it’s not true that I can’t write anymore. It’s just that…I don’t really want to talk and share too much. That’s just not me anymore. Is this growing up? Or am I just getting even bad at expressing myself?

I thought I would probably miss another entry this year but I decided that a short post like this one will do, just something I can look back to when I turn a year older and older and older.

Anyway, I hope you are all doing okay and that you are coping well. I will still blog and share my thoughts about lots of things. For one, I have a long pending list of kdrama reviews I want to finish. I will also probably write more about mid-life crisis questions I need to let out. Okay, I know, I am not that old. I just feel like I wouldn’t make it to 60 so this is my mid-life now. LOL I want to write more narrative stuff as well. And of course, poetry! I have written some short ones, but that would probably be posted on my Instagram instead. Yano, I have ALL these ideas in mind. I’m just lazy so I can’t work on them. 😛

Here’s to hoping I will stop feeling lazy. Well… until then.

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[Featured image from Unsplash]