you are allowed to…

For years, I dreamed of going back to school and take Literature and Writing. I didn’t really know if I like writing before college, so I took a practical choice and majored in Business. Or maybe a part of me did know, but I never got into school papers so I probably thought it wasn’t for me. And then I soon realized how I really enjoy making stories in my head and how I love the sound of poetry. But as we know it, things happen. I messed up my life and couldn’t afford to have that dream anymore. Going back to school means money, and I don’t have that.

That dream keeps coming back, though. No matter how much I struggle to write again. No matter how much I get frustrated that the words don’t flow through me as easily as it once did. I blame our homework for bringing back these thoughts.

여러분 잘하는 2가지는 무엇입니까?
What are two things you’re good at?

We are asked to write a sentence in Korean answering this question. I don’t know what I’m good at without writing. I’m not even sure if I’m really good at it.

But I like my poems (at least some of them) so that’s what I wrote.

저는 시를 잘해요. 언제가 한국어 시를 썼으면 좋겠어요.
I’m good at poetry. I hope to write a poem in Korean someday.

I might never take that Literature and Writing course in this lifetime, but I’m glad to have another dream that involves learning (Korean) and writing (poetry). I guess it’s safe to say that I love poetry so much that I even want to be able to write it in my third language. And in case you don’t know yet, I have a poetry account on Instagram. I am slowly getting back to it.

A year ago, I would never dare to dream this but like what my friend said here, we are really making progress. Even it requires us to attend classes at midnight then stay up later to finish homework just so we can learn, it’s worth it.

Life is really a crazy journey, right? You always have to adjust, compromise, and consider your circumstances before taking actions. Most of the time, you have to give up on some dreams because you have to prioritise other things to survive. Or simply because you have outgrown that part of you. And that’s what I love about dreams and goals, we are allowed to change it. We are allowed to take different paths. We are allowed to grow—even if that means to bloom where you are planted or to uproot yourself again and again until you find a place for you to fully, wonderfully, gracefully blossom. 🤎

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[Featured image from: Taylor Swift’s Al Too Well: The Short Film